I’m trying to understand men but they are a strange species. After 32 years of marriage I know a lot about men’s hobbies, their thirst for competition, their dirty laundry and the pungent smell it gives off, their voracious appetites…I just don’t understand their communication style. Actually, what I really don’t understand is their lack of communication. Or their lack of need to communicate deeply and thoroughly.
Basically when it comes to communication, women Do and men Don’t. I mean, men will talk. From time to time. They just don’t really put their All into communicating with us. There’s a subtle difference.
For example, I’m having a conversation with my husband. I’m using 2,346 words to try to adequately and completely explain my position on something, why it means so much to me, how it makes me feel…and he’s looking down at the callouses in his hands. Jiggling his leg up and down. Checking the weather on his phone.
“Honey, please, can you look at me when we talk?” I ask.
He looks at me. He is not rolling his eyes but he might as well be. I’d like his full attention when I’m talking with him. I want his eyes on me and his attention focused on what I’m saying. He wants the conversation to be shortened, for me to get to my point quicker, so he can get back to work. He needs to accomplish something–and so do I.
But what I want to accomplish is something big, in my mind. I’m trying to connect with him. I want to really understand him. And I want him to understand me, to hear my heart, so that we experience a real connection…