I love old maxims and proverbs, things like “Into every life a little rain must fall.” But I have a new saying of my own for all my single, dating friends out there, experiencing hope and heart ache–
Into every life, a little Relationship must fall.
Little Relationships are Relationships that are puny in perspective, and powerless to go the distance. They’re short-legged because they run out of steam from rushing ahead with emotion only to find there’s no substance after just one week of dating or after just one major disagreement. The first major fight you have, he’s all shaken up. She thinks the sky is falling.
It’s not only that “into every life, a little rain must fall.” Little Relationships must fall as well.
And be glad they fall.
Life is complex, hard, stressful at times. You need a Relationship that already has that as a given. You need a person in your corner with a realistic outlook on the work it takes to make a relationship work. And you need someone who doesn’t think “work” is a dirty word.
There’s a famous hymn that begins with “Take my life and let it be….” You can sing your own hymn of praise to God if someone just doesn’t want to be with you and breaks up with you– “Take this person and let them be; always, only, far from me.” You’re not singing it angrily or bitterly. No, you’re grateful you found out that they can’t go the distance. They won’t go the distance.
Maybe they lacked perspective on how to handle tough times. Or maybe they were always wishing you’d change and be something that you weren’t. Maybe you had more fights and arguments than you did times of laughter and just relaxing on the couch holding hands. The honest truth is, maybe they just weren’t the one for you, the one who could take you all in and smile big in appreciation and wonder that they got to have you in their life. Whatever it is that happened, they wanted out.
So you’re done with this little relationship.
Let it fall.
Because you’re not going to. You’re going to stand up strong and clear eyed. You see this break up for what it is. It’s time to change course. You deserve real love, a strong person, and a big relationship. A relationship big on encouragement, big on forgiveness, big on strong, gutsy love.